I find myself experiencing a feeling that I have to deal with all to often of late. I don't consider myself an overly violent individual; I do advocate the application of force to resolve problems that require it, but I am also typically willing to talk to people first.
Why is it then that I wake up every day to find a new message containing information that makes me want to desperately hurt someone. My hand to hand training android has been getting a workout lately, which can't be a good thing.
[end entry]0847
[resume entry]1558
God I feel dirty.
My illustrious leader has sold a substantial share of the entity that for all intents and purposes is my family, to a State controlled mega-corporation. Without a word, or desire for input; we've sold our souls to the political whorehouse, hoping that when the dust finally settles someone who has our proverbial balls in their hand will throw us a scrap from the table.
God damn him! If I had wanted a mega-corp to write my paycheck and control my life I would never have left the State in the first place. Well, I suppose I don't technically draw a paycheck; but the point stands. Now I have the privilege of risking my crews and my ships to defend assets of a group that spits on the place I call home? Where is the sense in that? Who in their right mind would crawl into bed with the very people that are subjugating our planets, our people? What the FUCK was he thinking?!
God damn it, where's the resignation paperwork...
[end entry]1609
[resume entry]1617
Alright, no resignation. It's not like there is anywhere else for me to go, and I have an obligation to these people.... even him, as much as that pains me at the moment. How the hell am I supposed to just sit by and watch my home burn... again?
I guess I have a pretty good idea how my ancestors must have felt after entering into the Caldari State.... only to have the mega-corporations exploit our world to an hairsbreadth of being uninhabitable.
God, I'm so angry I feel like I'm going to be sick. I suppose I need to go beat on the sparring android again. God help Mjalnar if I run into him today, I would really prefer not to be arrested on murder charges....
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